Going Forward

This has been a powerful time of looking back and releasing stored pockets of old energy that have been held faithfully in the cells of my body.   I say faithfully because our bodies hold some stuck pieces of our lives in stasis until the time comes for us to attend to and release them.  If that time never comes, then those life stories go with us to the ends of our lives.  If that time does come, then we are invited to let go of burdensome thoughts and memories.  Each stored pocket that we release is something that was never intended to be taken with us into the unfolding of our best selves.  As we let go of each of these stories and experiences, a weight is taken off of what we carry.  Eventually, we become lighter and we only carry the version of our personal lives that is the most true and authentic.  In my experience of this consistent letting-go process my spirit has become lighter with the release of each piece of stored energy.  By now I feel like a butterfly floating in the sunshine on a light breeze.  I feel so grateful to be lifted up in this way.

And so, now, I feel like I am being invited into a time of looking forward, not backward.  My best way to do this is by staying present in my life.  When I think about what is coming, it just feels like a lot of uncertainty.  I have never felt comfortable with uncertainty.  For me, the best way to become comfortable with uncertainty is to stay present so that I can savor the moments of my life.  I do believe that we create in each present moment the things that will become our experience of going forward.  The other vital piece of this process is to trust that "what is coming" will be perfectly suited for the authentic self that I have uncovered and restored.  Trust is coming so much more easily since I feel lighter and less encumbered.  Again, I feel grateful for this new life experience.

"Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing monkey bars.  You have to let go at some point in order to move forward."

             --C. S. Lewis

"Happiness is letting go of what you think your life is supposed to look like and celebrating it for everything that it is."

             --Mandy Hale  

  

Seeing With an Open Heart

I am feeling a lot of Love and positive energy coming into my life.  Amazing energies are flowing.  Yes, even in the simple movements of my day.   I feel like this positive flow is the result of years of opening my heart.  I have peeled back layer after layer of the heart wall that was constructed in my early life.  This letting go and releasing of each layer has opened my heart a little more each time.  After my lifetime of diligence and staying the course, my heart is now light, free, and open.  Yay!!

An open heart leads me to feel connection with others, with nature, and with the true work of my life and soul.  By clearing out the protective layers of my walled heart I have been able to receive and to be open to Love.  This open-hearted connection to Love has allowed me to transform and to step into my New Life with its new forms.  I have moved into the energy of Love, and that gives me the power to move forward.  My actions are now able to radiate this Love out toward others and into the larger world.

I am seeing with my heart.  I am seeing, hearing, smelling, tasting, touching, and experiencing with my open heart.  It's a lovely world we are living in.  :)

"We often think of seeing as something the eyes do.  Vision, in common understanding, is about light, shape, form -- about things 'out there.'  But on the path of inner growth, I've come to realize that the act of seeing goes far beyond what the eyes perceive.  In the spiritual tradition I come from, true seeing is not visual -- it's relational, experiential, and deeply interior."

                        --Senai Demirci, MD

 

Just BE

To just BE means I have to let go of doing.  We are in such a culture of doing, of performing, of making things happen.  BE-ing is something we have little experience with.  So much of my doing has been a distraction, a filling of time.  This "making things happen" is so ingrained in us that we feel like we are supposed to fill up our time with doing.  This task performance and doing feels unrelated to my true self.  It feels disconnected from my core energy, my life force energy.
If I spend my time just Being, then I am able to attend to each moment.  Time takes care of itself; my life takes care of itself.   That's such a reversal of our conditioning.  If I attend to each moment as it comes, I won't know anything about how my day is meant to unfold, and that's okay.  I will just connect with each moment that leads to the next, and the next -- until I see, by looking back, what the day has been about.  I am then able to see what things wanted to be accomplished.  Our first thought is:  "Wait, I'll never get anything done!"  And yet, I have had the experience of Being, of following the moments, and then observing all of the things that I got done without any pressure or a fixed schedule.  Just Being seems like a strange way to approach life.  And yet it feels very freeing, effortless, and perfect.  When I did let the day unfold naturally, organically, without a plan, it gave me the freedom to complete important activities in their own time, and it even led to some extra surprise visits that were not on my radar.  I believe it can be a true and constructive way to live.  And any lesser or greater amount of Being can be integrated into our current life structures as a way of practicing this approach.

"When you learn to flow with Life, you discover the way to just be.  When you simply are, you are happy."

                               --Avis Viswanathan

"Be resolutely and faithfully what you are; be humbly what you aspire to be."

                               --Henry David Thoreau

    

Butter-Fly

There are many unknowns in all of Life.  It feels important to stay in tune with what fits and what doesn't, as a way of being in alignment with the Unknown.  Sometimes the right situation comes along.  All you can do is say "yes."  Even with a lot of unknowns.  I have quietly waited for some time, doing lots of inner prep work.  It has felt a little like being in a chrysalis.  It has all felt right to surrender to this transition mode.  And then recently, along came a suggestion, an opportunity.  It also felt right to say "yes."   So now I am having the great sensation of beginning my new Life.  Like a butterfly sitting on the edge of a leaf--preparing to fly for the first time.  It's monumental.  It's also just the next step in a long series of ordinary steps. It's an event in a string of events that I experience as my Life.  I am leaving the cocoon.  I am ready to fly!

"Open your wings and let your dreams fly for every thought counts."

                    --Debatrayee Banerjee

  

Vulnerable

Vulnerable.  It's a feeling that we in this culture don't want to feel.  It's an emotion I am currently feeling, and I feel uncomfortable.  Vulnerability is something we don't like.  It goes against what we have been taught.  We are from a culture of competence, strength, accomplishment, and we are good at hiding weakness.

And yet...in my journey on this planet I have had numerous experiences of being vulnerable--of having and expressing vulnerable feelings.  And I lived through each one.  I even thrived.  I learned that when I acknowledged and expressed my vulnerable feelings, I experienced connection.  Even though it wasn't easy, I became stronger.  Vulnerability is a strength of authenticity.  It is a connection to our own spark, and to the spark of others.  It has led to great shifts and changes in my life that would not have been possible otherwise.

So, if you notice that you are having vulnerable feelings, sit with them for a while.  Hold them in your arms.  Show them some love, and listen to see if they have a message for you.  Let vulnerability live in your heart.  It will bring amazing Love and change to your Life.   Wishing you peace and blessings.

"Vulnerability -- the last thing I want you to see in me, and the first thing I look for in you."

                   --Brene Brown

"Vulnerability is terrifying.  The courage it takes to reveal your heart is one of the most daunting...and yet rewarding experiences in life.  It will set you free."

                   --The Better Man Project

     

All is Well

Is that for real?  Can it be true that all is well as we are surrounded with chaos in the world?  These disturbances don't feel like wellness.  And yet, deep in my heart, and in the grand scheme of things, I know that all is well and it will just get better.  

Years ago I did some personal inward exploration by working with Animal Medicine and with the spiritual essence that different animals possess.  I found a connection with one animal in particular.  Strangely enough, it was the Horseshoe Crab.  The horseshoe crab has a body that looks like a shield.  This physical adaptation provides strong external protection while soft body parts are hidden underneath.  This animal knows how to survive.  It is considered to be a "living fossil," originating 250 million years ago, according to Wikipedia.  Similar looking fossils have been found that date back to 445 million years ago, long before the age of dinosaurs.  Amazingly, they are still alive in our world today.  Horseshoe crabs have adapted to be able to live both in water and on land.  They scoot along close to the sand and remain fairly unaffected by outside changes.  Consistent with today's imbalance, human impact has currently depleted their numbers.  Still, all is well.

I know this because I have experienced this Truth for myself.  I was strengthened and affirmed in my own life by integrating the Spirit of Horseshoe Crab as I worked with that animal wisdom.  Also, after many years of watching the twists and turns of my own life, I have healed, grown, and learned to Trust that my life is well-cared for by an Infinite Source that I embody, and that is also Larger than myself.  I have Trust that this benevolent energy is at work in my life and in the world as we change.  Creator Energy is assisting us as we scoot along, well-protected.  And as we roll through these waves of change we must each follow the path that leads to our own version of Peace, Constancy, and Stability.  Large Love is helping us always.

"Your first task is to find the place where your soul is at home."

                  --Thomas Moore

"The blessings for which we hunger are not to be found in other places or people.  These gifts can only be given to you by yourself.  They are at home at the hearth of your soul."

                  --John O'Donohue    

 

  

Growing Pains

There are challenging energies in our world currently that are hard at work trying to suppress, oppress, control, and eradicate.  This aggressive lashing out is the ailing symptom of a long-buried wound and lack of awareness that have long been in place in our humanity.  It is an anti-life energy because it has been allowed to stay covered and to devolve into deep infection and ill health.  These ailing energies are struggling.  They are on their way out.  They are sounding loudly because they have been brought to the surface and revealed for what they are.  There is nowhere for them to go but away.  They are desperate because their power is waning, and they are in full-on expressive fear mode.  Now is the time to remain calm and neutral about these events, and to even have compassion as these energies burn themselves out.  The wound has been lanced, the infection is working its way out, and it will eventually be fully released.  This release process is resulting in some very intense things happening on our planet right now.

As disturbing as this all appears to be, it is not the ultimate Truth.  This too shall pass.  After the lanced wound has been cleared, the healing and rebuilding process will come forward.  In fact, there are already signs of energy being poured into creative solutions for problems we presently encounter.  This creative energy is pro-life.  It is the same life force energy that prompts green leaves and flowers to come to life in the springtime, or after a fire, drought, or other catastrophe.  This time of intensity will not last.  Even at this present time many courageous people are nurturing a heart-centered and loving energy, and they are offering positive alternatives that bring a counterbalance to the current challenges on our planet.  There is so much good happening now if we take the time to shift our focus, see it, and honor it.

"Although the world is full of suffering, it is full also of the overcoming of it."

                   --Helen Keller

"To heal is to touch with love that which was previously touched by fear."

                   --Stephen Levine    

Provision

 

As we move into the quiet winter season, all of nature (including humans) has focused its attention on making it through the cold days ahead.  All creatures have adapted in ways that suit their metabolism, feeding habits, and overall home environment.  We humans have built sheltered structures and created sources of heat for warmth.  We can access large grocery stores and we have created extensive shipping systems that can keep those stores well-supplied.  Our adaptations have caused our natural survival instincts to kick in only in times of extreme weather.  We have all that we need to be comfortable through the winter.  So, we don't have the same high awareness that animals do about "fending for themselves."  And still, we worry.  No matter what circumstances we find ourselves in, we are hard-wired to worry.

The truth of Life is that there is enough--there is Plenty--for all.  As humans we are uniquely gifted with the ability to choose to connect inwardly with All That Is, the larger Cosmos, Great Spirit.  And this connection with Source allows that energy and light to provide us with everything we need.  Worry is not the Truth.  Worry comes from fear.  Worry comes from a broken and incomplete understanding of who we really are.  We are whole, complete beings who live on a custom made beautiful Earth, and we are deeply intertwined with our Loving Creator.

We are now in a time of moving toward a lived experience of this Truth.  We are moving into a new reality based in Love, not fear.  We are now able to choose to close out the old way of living and being, and to open the door to the new way of thriving in our own natural environment, and in community with each other.  This winter time encourages and nurtures this transition from old to new.

"God's path will never lack God's provision."

              --Tony Evans

"Consider the ravens:  they neither sow nor reap, they have neither storehouse nor barn, and yet God feeds them."

              --Luke 12:24, the Bible 

Abundance

I am feeling abundance in these days of fall.  I have always loved the idea and experience of harvest.  Farming, harvest and abundance are closely connected, but harvest of food is not the only way to experience abundance.  Abundance can be energetic (warm interactions with others or sunshine on our skin), it can be what we enjoy (participating in a favorite activity) -- it can mean many things to different people.  This autumn time can be a time to revere and honor all that has come to us, possibly through a garden, or through cultivating the growth and outward  expression of our own true lives.  For me, this year feels like a time of receiving a large harvest, definitely from the garden, but also from my life of claiming my own personal power and peaceful center.

I believe abundance is the intended natural state of being human.  Sometimes we aren't able to recognize or receive the abundance that is authentically who we are or how we were created to to live and to be.  It is vital that we each create a path to our own meaningful abundance by releasing layers of beliefs that have kept us from living fully in this natural state of Being.

At this time of harvest and grateful attention to the richness of our lives, I invite you to reflect on what abundance means to you.  Notice and name clearly how you are receiving and living your own abundance on your Earth journey.

"Abundance is not a number or acquisition.  It is the simple recognition of enoughness."

                            --Alan Cohen

"Abundance is not something we acquire.  It is something we tune into."

                            --Wayne Dyer 

Here We Are...

Our planet is embroiled in the throes of Large Change.  The Oxford dictionary definition for throes is this:  "Intense struggle, especially accompanying birth, death, or great change."  Wow, all of those circumstances apply to our current situation!  We are all present and moving together with this change.  

In the midst of this we always have a choice:  Love or Fear?  It's hard to believe that everything really breaks down to this simple and basic choice.  For me, I know that the decisions of my life have been guided by the quality and quantity of energy I am expending.  Does this particular endeavor give me energy or does it drain my energy?  My choice for Love has come from that consideration.  

Early in my life I had no awareness of this choice.  I allowed much of my life force energy to be drained out of me by situations that didn't really align with who I was.  Over time I have learned that my life improves -- situations get better -- if I make choices for the things that I am energized by, not the things that will ultimately empty my fuel tank.  These are the choices that show me that I am on my path of purpose.  In addition, by making these choices to maintain my energy I am gifting myself, my life, and my involvements with more Love and positive feelings.  My choice for Love has been made in my lifetime through a thousand different decisions about energy expenditures.  Even though I may feel fear, I have come to know that choosing in favor of my best energy will bring me Love and satisfaction on my life path.  Fear easily falls away.

As we all continue to make our way through this transformative time we can stand in our own strength and make choices that will contribute toward bringing more Love into the world.  I wish you joy and well-being as you move through your life choices and changes. 

"Every day we're given a choice:  we can relax and float in the direction that the water flows, or we can swim hard against it.  If we go with the river, the energy of a thousand mountain streams will be with us... if we resist the river, we will feel rankled and tired as we tread water, stuck in the same place."  

                 --Elizabeth Lesser

 

Reorganizing

I am presently feeling that I am experiencing a different sort of organization in my brain, my body, my life.  That's a lot of shifting, but it feels very quiet and manageable to me, as well as being huge.  A new structure is being created.  I feel like my old foundation is crumbling.  Things that used to be important are dissolving into the background.  A new way, for me, of being and moving in the world is coming forward to be expressed.  It's unfamiliar to me and it feels like everything is a growing edge.  My focus is now on the new items of priority that are taking center stage in my life.  I am in a gentle discovery time of learning what is most important for me to consider at this time.  In general, this has to do with staying in a place of wonder and lightness in the world.  It also has to do with acquiring a new clarity about how my time is spent on a daily basis.  I don't have all of this worked out yet, but unfolding time will show me the way. 

"Choose your thoughts carefully.  Keep what brings you peace, release what brings you suffering.  And know that happiness is just a thought away."

                                 --Nishan Panwar 

   

Adventure

Recently, I wouldn't say I have thought of my life as an adventure.  I've just been doing a lot of gardening, watering, walking, and spending time at home.  No complaints--it has been my kind of peaceful time.  Also, after many years of completing tasks in various jobs and meeting life's obligations, I have felt like adventures have mostly happened on vacations or during planned activities with family or friends.

And yet... isn't every day a gift offered to us to enjoy and to express who we are in the world?  Lately, I have been feeling some energy stirring in my life toward change and new expressions.  My perception of my life is transforming.  My life is beginning to feel like an adventure.  It feels like each day is waiting for my imprint, and that means I can make the choice to step into a New Unknown.  I can stay open and ready to move differently and to choose differently.  Sounds like small actions that may add up to large adventures.

"Adventure is a path.  Real adventure, self-determined, self-motivated, often risky, forces you to have firsthand encounters with the world."

                          --Mark Jenkins

    

Simple Joys

Life keeps going.  The energy that we express in life determines the direction life will go.  I find that my life works better -- goes in a creative/constructive direction -- when I pay attention to the simple joys in my day.  Large things are always competing for our attention.  And small things sometimes get overlooked if we lack attention or the intention to take note of them.  If we are able to stop In the middle of our busyness and reflect on the uplifting moments of our day, then we are refreshed.  These moments are the building blocks of life.  They will lay the best foundation for the day we are living right here, right now.  These days accumulate and make up our lives. 

Sunshine, blueberries, rainbows, loving pets, summer flowers.  Make your own list and enjoy!

"When you are happy with what you have, something magical happens.  Everything you have becomes enhanced.  You see the value of everything around you increase with your appreciation of it."

                           -- Stacie Martin  

Lighthearted

I have been thinking a lot about what it means to be lighthearted.  I personally am invested in having a light heart as much as possible.  Not wanting to be bogged down by the troubles of the world or of my own day.  Lately, I have felt light-hearted through no effort of my own.  For me that's the best kind of light heartedness.  It tells me that I am well aligned with my soul's energy--so much so that heaviness can't even settle in my heart.  Yay!

It doesn't need to take much effort to feel light of heart.  We can access this kind of peace anytime.  We can fill our hearts with the light of love and compassion by choosing to dwell on topics, experiences, and images that bring warmth and love to our hearts.  Even when faced with tragic stories there are many parts of those stories that can lift our hearts--people  showing great courage, amazing rescues, others who offer generous help in the midst of a disaster.  Beauty and strength can be found and celebrated in many ways.  Inevitably we will feel joy and peace with this kind of focus, and a light heart usually follows as a result.  Our world is clamoring for us to put our attention on its trials and troubles.  But we are free people and we have choice about where we place our best energy.  I am choosing to focus on all of the uplifting things that are in this phenomenal world.  That always lights up my heart.

"Love is the light that brightens every heart's darkness."

                      --Bryant McGill   

The Spark

We humans come to this life with a spark of Light.  Many things can happen in life that might cover it over and add layers on top of it.  We may feel that the spark has dimmed, and we may even believe that it has been extinguished.  The great news is that it can never be fully extinguished.  As long as we are breathing and have a heartbeat, our spark is also still alive.  Sometimes life gets heavy.  Finding or reconnecting with our spark feels like it will never happen.  If we take some time for ourselves, become quiet and listen, we can find our way back to the spark.  Others may help or suggest a way, but each of us has our own way that can only be discovered by us.  You will know in your heart when the connection has happened because  you will feel a growing warmth within.  You will feel brighter and lighter.  Go toward that warmth and light.  Follow any activities that connect you with those feelings.  There is a way back to your spark always.  Keep going. 

"Trust yourself.  Create the kind of self you will be happy to live with all your life.  Make the most of yourself by fanning the tiny inner sparks of possibilities into flames of achievement."

                                         --Golda Meir

Gratitude

I haven't thought about this in a while.  It feels like it has almost become a cliche to use the word 'gratitiude.'  It suffers from being an overused platitude, and the word might feel a bit contrived at times.  Still, today I am thinking about how uplifting it is to bring awareness to the good that is present in my life.  It's easy to get bogged down with all of the noise and distraction of our current world.  And yet, recently I have been taking a moment to stop and focus on the things that bring me joy in every hour of the day.  With this pause I have noticed a response of warm gratitude inside that has bubbled up very naturally and freely.  Yay!  Such a great feeling!  Putting my energies into this awareness has felt like it sparked some creative positivity that I was sorely needing.  These feelings of joy and thankfulness have been feeding my soul at a stretch of time when I have felt my soul energy being drained.  Joy and gratitude can be my superpowers through these challenging days of change

"Be grateful for your life, every detail of it, and your face will shine like a sun, and everyone who sees it will be made glad and peaceful.  Persist in gratitude, and you will slowly become one with the Sun of Love, and love will shine through you its all-healing joy.  The path of gratitude is not for children; it is the path of tender heroes, of the heroes of tenderness who, whatever happens, keep burning on the altar of their hearts the flame of adoration."

                           --Jelaluddin Rumi 

All is Moving Well

These times are changing quickly.  I am transitioning out of a long stretch of having agreed to surrender to the energies of waiting and not quite being fully aligned (inside and outside).  I am now feeling refreshed enough to say that I am having some new experiences that are lifting me up after some confusion and even suppression of my life force energy.  Such good changes and movement!  Things are moving as they should--naturally and organically.

Through all of this my true self has known that I am being held in the loving embrace of Infinite Wisdom.  My soul has known that all is well and that all I need is provided.  This will continue to be true as I walk my path.

"When peace like a river

Attends my way

When sorrows like sea billows roll

Whatever my lot, You have taught me to say

It is well, it is well

With my soul."

            --Horatio Spafford, 1873

  

Being and Receiving

Through attending to my Being changes have come.  They have come gradually over time, little by little.  I have been aware of receiving better and better things as time has passed.  During this week the theme of receiving has been strong.  Receiving by Being, and especially receiving in the moment.  This is the freshest and most potent version of receiving I have experienced in my life.  We are meant to have abundance and all that we desire.  My recent personal experience of that has been wonderful and rich.

"The Universe does not require you to stress for good things."

               --Alan Cohen  

    

A New Day

This is the phrase that I have been hearing for several days now.  As I make art, as I journal, and in the quiet of the mornings.  What-has-been is over and done, never to be experienced again in that way.  Whatever is coming is being created in each day, and the accumulation of these days becomes the future.

We have a clean slate.  A bright day ahead for each of us to express the wonderful qualities that make us individual creations in the Universe.  Every moment is a gift for us to receive fully and to embrace with our whole hearts. These moments make every day new. 

"The art of living consists in being completely sensitive to each moment, and regarding it as utterly new and unique."

                         --Alan Watts      

Connection

I often feel like I am slogging through these days with the weight of my own forward movement on my shoulders.  While that is not the true reality, the feeling is with me until I make some meaningful connection.  I have recently been aware of a deep spiritual longing to connect.  Even though I may not feel a connection with others or in my home space, eventually I do feel connected with the energy of Source.  When that happens the heavy slog feeling disappears, and all of the elements of my life are brought together in a connected and unified way.  This reconnection feels like a gift from the Universe. Sometimes when I just don't have the energy to make a connection, that connection will come to me unexpectedly and effortlessly.  I am always surprised by this, and it brings me Joy in a big way.  We are not alone in this world.  We are moving through stressful times, and there are many ways we are able to make a meaningful connection.  Loving Presence customizes and provides what we most need, exactly at the time we need it.  We are here to receive the caring gift, and to be uplifted on our life path.

"Spiritual connection is our ability to intuitively understand something that impacts our soul and gives meaning to our lives.  Some people experience spiritual connection by having a relationship to the Creator...and all living things."

                            -- We R Native articles